Agam Goldstein-Almog, 18, who was kidnapped with her mother and two younger brothers from Kibbutz Nahal Oz on October 7 and released after 51 days in captivity, attended her high school graduation on Wednesday. Like any other teenager, she had imagined the joyous event differently. Now it was a marked with mixed emotions.
Agam posted on her Instagram page about a conversation she had had with her father, after he suffered a serious injury, about having to graduate without him. "You are exaggerating," he told her at the time.
"You don't know that Yam wasn't there either. You don't know how sad it is when I should also be happy. You don't know how much we talked about you and how much I felt you were with me there yesterday. In every heartbeat, in every tear, and every smile – there was you,” she wrote to her Dad.
“How can you I part with 12 years of school when I haven't yet parted with two most precious people to me? How sad and how joyful it is to live; how joyful it is to celebrate things I never thought I would achieve.”
Finally she said: "What remains are experiences. I was in Gaza with them, and I will continue to live for them. Twelve years that today seem like a different world, but they will always be a good memory that could have been better."
Agam was released in the first Israel-Hamas hostage deal along with her mother and brothers, Gal and Tal. Since then, she has been actively fighting for the release of the remaining hostages, some of whom are members of her kibbutz, and with whom she met in captivity.
Last week, Goldstein-Almog participated in the Muni Expo 2024 Urban Innovation Conference, where she said she was "hurt by Israeli citizens. I was told things like 'too bad you came back' or 'you had it easy in captivity'."
She praised the successful extraction of four hostages earlier in the month but said the trauma of being taken hostage, was long-lasting. "On a personal note, life is still on hold for me, I’m not home yet. I’m dealing with loss.”
She added, "I received appalling responses from people living with me here on the same land. It was as if you thought you were my enemy. Why would anyone say something bad about me? It shattered me.”
"Why do we judge the hostages who returned from captivity? Because they came back smiling? It's a crazy experience that can't be dealt with easily,” she said. “I’m not sure it can be internalized and processed. Thank God they came out whole and healthy and met their families.”